The classes

And I thought terror was over after first year. I am intimidated! Last night was Real Property, and while I thought,and think, that I have a bit of an edge in that due to my line of work, the professor will make it a real challenge. He is a commissioner, and quick witted, funny as hell and sharp. Engaging in discussion with him will be stimulating and all consuming, but he has the edge of knowing the law well and more importantly, where we are going. No doubt he will win in all encounters, but I'm going to give it a try. His approach is different than any of our prior professors. He assigned cases or pages to each of us,and we basically need to know our assignments inside out. I have a page and a half of notes. At first glance, that sounds like a light assignment, but I'm sure he will break us down, one at a time. And I for one want to meet that challenge. But of course the risk of failure is daunting, and the ensuing embarrassment that would result is what I fear the most.

And tonight, we have Civil Procedure. This professor is also a commissioner, and he seems to have an ego. He is having fun finding ways to make us look a little ignorant, and to 'school' us. I find this annoying but I will withhold judgment for now. I have heard good things about him from other students who have had him. So I'll pend for now.

Tomorrow, Evidence.

The holy trinity, more or less. Each of the second year professors seem to have a similar theme-time to start thinking like a lawyer, a professional, and to treat class assignments as a serious endeavor. As our Property professor said, if you are going to practice law in this county, your classmates and professors will be your peers, and this is first impression time.

falling like flies

We 20 or so is now just we 9 remaining. Brutal. Some of the people who made such an impact are gone. Some due to grades, some for other reasons. Life takes lots of turns, and law school is hard on folks.

We will be joined tomorrow night by the class of January starts, and we will then journey through this year together. Hopefully we will meld well. They will have just finished Contracts, Torts and Criminal Law, and after a few weeks, some of them will disappear as well, due to grades. But there's no sense of superiority available as we watch that happen. It's too easy to become one of those who don't make it.

Adding to this is some other drama swirling about. As I was warned by a wise friend, things tend to splinter at the end of first year. And so we head into 2L with a gutted class, and some of the ones I most dearly wanted to travel this road with have stepped away.

Treasure hunt

Treasures abound at Hastings School of Law library. Outcasts and the likes of me are allowed in, and I got lost in the stack upon stack of law books, all at my disposal. I went there to see what they might have about Islamic law (Shari'ah law) and was not disappointed.

I shall return, but for now, I must devote my attention to 2nd year topics: Evidence, Civ Pro and Real Property.

Year 2

Hard to imagine that I still have 3 more years of law school. One year down, plus a summer of classes. The 3 years ahead stretch out interminably, but I know how fast this last year went.

Evidence, Civil Procedure and Real Property on the horizon. One week off, between finals and the start of the new year. I will spend it reading for the new classes, of course. Time off is an illusion, at least until after the Bar exam.

It will be interesting to see the make up of our class next week. We have lost so many from the 20 that began, and it saddens me. The interplay between the various class mates, and the personalities, particularly of the more outspoken, served to enrich and expand our experience this past year. We will gain those who just completed their 1st year classes over the summer, and then in a few weeks, we will lose a few of them, when grades come out for the semester just ended. As the advice goes at this juncture-wait to befriend any of the new ones, some of them will be suddenly gone in 3 or 4 weeks. But of course, I'll find that advice hard to heed. I am more social than I ever realized before.

While I too await grades from my summer classes, I do not have to worry about being ADQ'd from them, just because I have already passed the first year. Two of the three are pass/fail, and do not affect my GPA. I do not have high hopes for my Crim Pro grade, but I hope to at least pass.

It's a roller coaster ride, and sometimes I get anxious about what the next turn will bring.

satisfaction

My mother used to say "be careful what you wish for." The truth is that we mostly don't know what will satisfy us, and what we cast our yearning eyes upon is usually not going to give more than momentary satisfaction should we obtain or attain it.

And so I am, as often, discontent. Not with law school, work, friends or family. I think the discontent runs deeper than that, and is part of the essence of my being. I shall not ever be satisfied. Best felt on a Sunday afternoon perhaps, but I sense that missing piece more often than I care to admit. My parents, and many others, would counsel me to turn to a religious solution. But I have no hope of that filling this void either. It must feel authentic, or I cannot espouse it.

I think I want something or someone, and that if I can just have that, I will be content. But discontent soon follows.

Perhaps it is my natural condition, and I must become either comfortable with it, or at least accept it. Hard to fathom how to accept discontent. By definition those two seem irreconcilable. The only consolation is that now I know how fleeting satisfaction is, and I treasure it when it resides in me. But just as the morning brings new hope, new pleasure, just as surely it brings discontent all over again. What was satisfaction yesterday no longer is, or it must at least be gotten again.

As the song says, "I can't get no satisfaction...I try, and I try and I try and I try..."

What I can do tomorrow

The tri-annual slog has begun. At least this time around there is really only one class. Perhaps next summer I will take the summer classes more seriously. I seemed to think I had time...later. And now later has arrived. And still I procrastinate.

old knowledge newly discovered

A friend gave me a copy of the New Yorker that has an article about Lucretius and his two thousand year old epic poem, "On the Nature of Things." I think I am in trouble. Fascinating, and I must know more. The article tempted me with other things, either never known, or long forgotten, that now I must rediscover for myself.

We recently embarked on a self directed pursuit of the sources of law, and I have decided to investigate Shariah law, or Islamic law, and its roots. Which explains why I now have my very own copy of the Quran. And while I should be working on my Bankruptcy final, I can't quite tear myself away from these discoveries just yet.

If only I had been so curious as an undergrad years ago. What wasted time and years!