see saw

There seems always to be an inequality of friendship that cannot ever be resolved. Much like romantic relationships where one loves more than the other, this is a recurring theme in nearly all relationships, it seems. I do not want the burden of you caring more than I do, nor do I want the weakness of caring more than you. The options, though, seem limited. Check out completely? How to do that and still squeeze all the juice out of life? I know enough about who I am that I know certain strategies simply are not sustainable. It may be a uniquely American issue-this need for community and belongingness, with a still stronger need for independence and the ability to limit our commitment to others. Sounds rather selfish, doesn't it? Yet it is our culture, and part of who we are. And I rather like the freedom it gives, frankly. I think perhaps it means loneliness for many, but then again, it is quite possible to be lonely in a crowd of people who know you but do not understand you (aka family). And being boxed in by one's history has its drawbacks as well. Push and pull, yin and yang, what will it be? Probably a constantly shifting response to the most immediate need, and no long term comprehensive approach to life on this planet. Humanity is sometimes beautiful, sometimes ugly, but always messy.